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Mark Stouder

Men's Traps - Vulnerablility

Updated: Mar 24, 2023

What do you think about when I say courage? Do you picture some hero facing overwhelming odds and beating the bad guys?


The root of the word courage is cor – the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage had a very different definition than it does today. Courage originally meant & To speak one's mind by telling all one's heart.


It has been said, “ life is all about relationships and the rest is just details.”


We all long for relationships that develop into meaningful connections with others - but with Hollywood and social media we think the connection is being someone else that has it all together. Someone who’s successful, the body is toned, popular, outstanding in every way according to the world.


God created us with a deep-seated need for connection. Connection gives us a sense of belonging and the true fulfillment of not being alone. Being known for who we REALLY are, with no cover-up, no deception,no lies..just the honest truth of who we truly are…to be authentic.


We long for people to love us even if they know our authentic selves.


If we accept and believe that God fully knows us, and accepts us thru the blood of Jesus, even though we are riddled with failures, then it is no longer my own merit that matters …it is Jesus that the Father sees in me. My failures are covered by the blood.


We no longer have to justify ourselves- we are justified now by Christ once and for all.. I no longer need the justification of others.


Romans 8:1 – Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,


This then gets rid of shame/condemnation and allows us to be vulnerable with each other. To let people see our hearts and our brokenness. To be courageous. Because I live on Christ’s unshakable love for me, I can share my weakness with others, knowing that Jesus already knows my failures. I don’t have to be good enough, my life cleaned up enough for Him to be connected to me. Because I am justified by Jesus I don’t need to earn justification from others. Therefore I can be vulnerable to my weakness and failures.


Mathew ch 9


10  While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples.  11  When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12  On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  13  But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ [a]  For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”


Jesus modeled this pattern of connection with others thru their weakness as sinners.


Relationships grow stronger thru the sharing of our weaknesses and being vulnerable. Not the sharing of our strengths. Because people can identify deep down with failure because we are all failures. And once I can identify with you, I can make a connection.


Pride can be a stumbling block to vulnerability- Pride binds us to be justified by our own successes and we judge others in that performance-based way. We then teach this to our children by how we act and conditionally accept them. Pride makes us compare ourselves to others so that we compare our self-rightness. Pride and Ego need to be constantly built up by measuring how much better we are than others. This kind of competition kills vulnerability which in turn denies the connection. So the very thing we desire most eludes us and leads us down the road of loneliness.


Proverbs 20 v 5

The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters,

    but one who has insight draws them out.


I believe the insight might be a vulnerability

Lord help us to live in the truth that you alone justify us …we don’t need to be justified by others. Lead us to be vulnerable and authentic so that we can share our hearts with others. So that we can usher in the spiritual doctor to the sick.


In Jesus' name. Amen

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